The Grass is Greener on The Other Side (Or, Not)

For the past weeks, I’ve been getting messages from my friends. And I’m not sure why they’re talking about the same topic (FYI, they don’t know each other and they’ve never met each other before).

They’re asking the same question to me, “How to be happy?”

As much as I want them to read my blog post about happiness, I’ll just be a good friend and answer as wise (or witty) as I could possibly can (which most of the time, I can’t). And it’s definitely not the right time to discuss the Law of attractions with them either.

I think I can almost conclude that most people feel bored with their lives. I believe most of you are tired of working from 8 to 5. Some of you feel that you just want to give up with your relationships. Another group of you might want to pack your bags and leave this planet, start a new life, if you only could. (That would be quite expensive though, because the journey to Mars needs a lot of money, which only means you need to work really F*cking harder for that). So let’s skip the latter option, shall we?

Most of us have different lifestyles, wealth, opportunities, responsibilities, etc; that we tend to get worried of certain things, and worse, we start to compare ourselves to others. The worst thing is when we compare our own life with the ones on Instagram.

Your watch may be digital, but your live is analog

Well, thanks to the technology that now, life becomes easier (or not?).

We have more choices on everything, that we become tired of choosing. We become so scared that our choices are wrong just because there are so many of them to choose from!

How many of you lie awake at night, thinking about what you’re doing, or what you’ll do next, or what you’ve missed out, or what you’ve wasted?

In a world where everything is in a fast pace, we tend to walk with a sense of urgency. We think we are running out of time to do big things and if we don’t catch up, we’ll fail.

This is why, it’s so easy for us to feel burdened. To feel that we haven’t met our own criteria as a successful businessman, as a supervisor, as a happy wife, as a loving husband, as a child, as a parent, and so on.

All of us, are running, towards what we call happiness. But what most of us don’t know; is that

If you can’t feel happy TODAY, you won’t be, tomorrow.

You’re only creating disaster when you focus on things you don’t have. You will NEVER EVER be happy if you think the grass is always greener on the other side. *In case of Instagram, you know they can filter the grass, which makes a greener green?

Once you move into that greener grass, you’ll start to think that the other neighbor's grass is greener, and the neighbor's next to your neighbor's grass.. and this thought will never stop.

Focus on the present, because the present is a gift (oh yeah, you’ve heard this before, you’ll always hear it!)

Quoting from Aunty Acid:

“Caffeine is bad for you

Fat is bad for you

Sugar is bad for you

But don’t Worry

Worrying is bad for you too!”

*If you don’t know who’s Aunty Acid, you can find it here (she’s like.. the funniest, bitchiest, most sarcastic realistic aunt you’ll ever want to meet and do high-five with!)

Whenever you start to worry or you lose yourself, or wonder if you could be happy somewhere else; it’s time to slap yourself back to the present moment and see what’s surrounding your life right now.

You have your parents still alive? Grateful for that!

You can spend money on a cup of coffee? Great!

You have books to read? That means you have sights, right? Thank God!

You have friends to laugh with or lean on? Then you have everything!

Please, enjoy the moment and stop worrying too much, because it’s all we’ve got. Our past has gone and don’t worry about the future – it hasn’t arrived yet.

The grass isn’t greener on the other side. It never is.

What to Do When Everything That Can Go Wrong Does Go Wrong

Let’s admit, it’s not easy to deal with any rejection – be it a relationship, a job interview or anything else in between.

It is even harder to stay positive when all the problems seem to swallow you up. We can feel really bad when we lose our job or when our relationship seems to be stuck. The reason why we feel bad is because people can’t deal with rejections.

Some of us may not be able to properly handle these bad experiences because simply, we don’t know how to.

Rejection is inevitable
In almost any stage of our lives, we have dealt with rejections whether it’s in love, social life or job. The best way we can do is to have a proper understanding on how to deal with bad experiences and show trauma where the door is.

Rejection is part of life
Even Donald Trump has dealt with rejections.
A failure doesn’t mean the end of the world. It simply is a pathway to help you notice which works and which doesn’t. When you deal with rejections in the right way, you will quickly learn that failure is just a pebble standing between you and your success. Of course, you will feel bad but don’t let it take over you.

Rejection that leads to insecurity
When we are criticized, we tend to feel insecure. We feel we are not good enough and hopeless. The senses arise and we wonder if the pains ever go away. As a human, we don’t get used to be abandoned or threatened.

And it is important not to worry about the fragility but think that we are only human. We have vulnerable sides and it is completely okay to feel bad after being rejected or criticized. But hey, didn’t American Idol judges criticize, too?

We tend to think that rejection is bad. Not being in the first position is bad; failing on a relationship is bad. Everything we do, we tend to distinguish the good and the bad without taking notes on the struggles.

When you are being rejected, that doesn’t mean you are a bad lover or a bad worker. It means you are shown the wrong things before finally finding the right one. It helps you to know which pain is worth the suffering before you finally reach your goals.

Sounds, cliché but true. It is up to you, whether to go down in despair or get back up and move on. Always be objectives It is hard not to be on one side but you need to think objectively when dealing with rejection.

Have you worked hard enough? Have you given enough attention and effort? It is wise to firstly look in the mirror and identify the problem threads before pointing fingers. Find your way to release the stress - Remember the last time someone broke your heart and look at you now, already forget about it?

This is what happens when you let time heals. The previous rejections are simply a reminder to keep you move on and knowing that you are on the right path to your goals be it in relationship or business. - Take a deep breath and let your body relax. The stress of works and the troubles of life can really break you into pieces if you don’t let the mind calm. Technically, this method has been used by psychologists and it is a basic relaxation technique that anyone can apply.

 - Think positive
Why do you have to think negatively when thinking positively costs nothing? It is better to feel good regardless of any circumstances you are going through. It is better to think that the rejection leads to the right path than to think the rejection leads to a doom.

 - Be open to the differences
Every person is unique and a situation may be handled differently. There will be no two people who think exactly the same way, even if they are twins. It is important to be self conscious when it comes to the differences in people and not to expect too high because it could possibly hurt you.